This has been such a special place for me. I started this blog up 12 days before Nola was born. I had no idea then that I would stay committed to this for more than 7 years, documenting not only what is going on in our lives, but also sharing my thoughts, feelings and the revelations God has bestowed upon me. This blog, this history, has become one of my most cherish possessions. I love to go back and reconnect with myself. Sometimes I go back and reread my testimonies, or birth stories, or anniversaries, or compare my kiddos baby stats. I go back to laugh, to cry, to reflect, to remember. Oh Lord, how grateful I am to be able to 'go back' and remember!! I had never really journaled before, so for the majority of my life I had nowhere to 'go back' to other than what memories I had in my head. I am so, SO grateful I took the time to write this stuff down.
Back in October of 2016, I started a devotional journal. I had finished reading the Book of Mormon again and just wasn't too sure where to go for study, so Simone gave me the idea and I decided to switch it up. My devotional journal had become yet another of one of my most cherished treasures. It is a place where I go and dig deep...deep into the scriptures and deep into my soul. I have wrestled with God over SO many things through those pages. Through them I have battled demons and parted seas, I have challenged the adversary and been left with gaping wounds. I have sought, fought, clung, hoped, despaired, triumphed, screamed, cried, begged and listened. I have been stretched and pulled in glorious ways and now feel so much more rooted. Rooted in who I am as a person - in what I want, what I need, what I believe and what I want to advocate for in this world. I am more rooted in my faith - the testimony I have of the restored gospel and the reality of a loving Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, keep me grounded and present in who I am as an individual. I am more rooted in my family and have come to a much deeper understanding of what that means to me. Who are my family? What does blood have to do with it? What connections do I have with my ancestors? This crazy and wild ride of devotion is so magnifying.
So, my darling blog, I love you dearly and do cherish all the goodness and memories you hold. I will continue to visit you and update you, however much of my time is now spent exploring the yet-to-be-discovered depths of my devotion. I hope to have these two special records cross paths and to intertwine, however that season is not yet.
Until then, let's stay connected.