All about me

I have typically used this blog just to post about Nola and our adventures with her, however I am feeling the need to write a post about me.

My whole life I have fought the 'battle of the bulge'. I have yo-yo'd with that last 10 pounds for years and years. When I graduated high school, I was 135lbs. That is the lightest I have ever been! When Simone and I moved to Lethbridge, I put on a whopping 35 lbs. Just before I left for China, I weighed 170lbs. I had never felt so disgusting in all my life. And when I say disgusting, I don't just mean fat. I was slow, sluggish and lazy. It was horrible! I was terrified to go to China, as all those who went before me told me that they gained weight. I was at a critical point - if I gained even 5 more lbs, I would be obese. People would refer to me as the 'bigger one'. I was so scared of that, so I got my running shoes on and went to work. While in China, I only taught for about 2-3 hours a day, so I had plenty of time to work out. I remember those first few runs - I would make it half way around the school complex and I could barely breathe! Thank goodness I had packed an inhaler. As the weeks and months passed, I got better, ran faster and went farther. I also played soccer a couple times a week, did power 90, hiked, fasted from sugar for 40 days (lent) and ate more fruits and veg from the market. 5 months of hard work resulted in the loss of 8lbs! Victory!

When I got home to Fernie, I continued to run and tried to 'work out' at work. I was housekeeping, so I would always take the stairs, even if I had to carry the vacuum or something. I lost another couple pounds before I headed back to Lethbridge for College. Back in Lethbridge I was down to 160lbs and doing well in school. Unfortunately, things took a turn for the worse with my mood and I ended up in the Pysch Ward of the Lethbridge Hospital for the 2nd time. Life sucked and I started to eat. I stayed home all day, in my PJ's and ate. I gained back the 10lbs I worked so hard to lose.

Then came Doug.

My night in shining armor, in every right and respect. It always makes me laugh - when Doug and I were first dating, I asked him what his 'type' was. He said he likes brunettes (I was platinum blonde) with an athletic build (I was 5'4" and 170 lbs - the furthest thing from an athletic build) Well, I must have done something he liked, as we just celebrated our 3rd anniversary and we are doing great! He helped me lose 10 lbs before our wedding, which I really appreciate. After the wedding, we really got down to business. Doug, Dori (Doug's sister) and I trained to do a Olympic Team Triathlon. I swam, Doug biked and Dori ran, at least that was the plan. Doug and I worked really hard. We went to the pool/gym 4 days a week and trained for an hour or so. We also ate really well - tons for fresh salads and delicious grains. (Unfortunately, we were unable to do the actual triathlon due to illness)

On Doug and I's first anniversary, I was down to 137lbs!!

Shortly after our first anniversary I got pregnant. I wasn't vomiting sick with that pregnancy, however I had nasty dizzy spells which kept me from work. I stayed home on sick leave for the first 9 weeks. While at home, I ate more than usual and started to gain weight...but I was pregnant, I was supposed to gain weight, right? I was up 12 lbs. Unfortunately, at 12 weeks we miscarried our sweet baby. What a hard time that was. We had heard that if you make it to 12 weeks, your in the clear, so we started telling our family and some co-workers. I lost 7 lbs immediately after the loss, but wasn't able to lose that last 5 lbs before I got pregnant with Nola.

While pregnant with Nola, I worked my butt off! I did not want to gain lots of weight, so I exercised every other day and really watched what I ate. I am happy to report I gain only 30lbs while pregnant and returned to my pre-pregnancy weight of 142lbs only 3 months after her birth.

But, now she is 10 1/2 months old, and I am still 142lbs.

I have not lost any more weight since June. Although I am close to the smallest I have ever been, I feel like crap. I eat horribly and often feel sluggish and tired. My skin has broken out and I am quite moody.

The point of this post? To change! I have learned that I can only change my behaviour if I admit there is a problem, not only to me, but to others. I need to be accountable! So here it is! I have an eating and laziness problem. I am going to work at changing my lifestyle to help me enjoy each and every day and to take care of the body my Heavenly Father has blessed me with. I am not going to set a weight goal - I am just going to work at becoming more active and more healthy.

Thanks for listening!!